Near-Miss Golden Years

WheatThe last month or so, fraught as it sometimes was with work drama and other bits of unpleasantness for people I cherish, has been stunning in some respects. Since discarding the guidelines, railings and judgments of others about God and about my life, I’ve been able to hear my own voice again. Intuition began to return, startling me at times with its clarity.Moving on the wisdom I previously hadn’t been able to hear in my heart has caused a sowing of some very crucial seeds. Much to my surprise, some of them are already growing and bearing  nourishing fruit.

Sustenance that has allowed greater personal and spiritual health for me - food for a balance I didn’t realize I could attain. But there is indeed a balance - an alchemy of time spent in effort and labor being weighed against time for love, play and laughter.

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Ego Bait

“Given that you name your price… we can keep you young and tender…” (Tears for Fears)

The advertisements/spam out there these days is really ugly. It keeps making unstoppable efforts at plying on people’s vanity and their desire for a magic bullet. How many times am I going to see that a mom lost 1600 lbs by obeying one secret rule? How about the fact that (probably the same) mom also discovered a way to whiten teeth by obeying one secret rule?

I’ve also been told thin lips are ugly. I’ve been told Acai berry stuff is the miracle silver bullet to suddenly make myself thin and desirable. What’s sad is that these up our noses ads work on someone, or they may stop pushing them. How many people clicked on the gyrating figure of a girl who had nothing to do with cheap mortages, and is now pushing cheap car loans?  There’s no winning these games. God I wish they’d just knock it off.

I can handle the usual ads that have been floating around for years… selling food and beverages, entertainment, etc. But the way these jerks are preying on desperate folks really stinks. Be natural in today’s culture - just say no to unnecessary cosmetic surgery, for example - if you dare!

Purification & Renewal

Tonight after work, I’ll be coming home and having a simple purification and renewal ceremony in my indoor sanctuary room. It’s a new moon after the summer solstice I so enjoyed. What better timing could there be? A purification suggests a need to be purified - and probably begs the question ‘are you dirty’? The answer is yes and no. Taking a page from the Shinto practices I so admire, I do this to help renew my spirit.

The ‘dirt’ in the equation is better compared to pollution - the heaviness left in my heart and my attitude after weeks of confusion, hard decisions, negative environments/people around me, any personal loss and stress. A purification ceremony is a great way to take some time to soak out the anxiety and tension, and re-align one’s spirit to the Divine. It helps to open channels between us and the Sacred.

The Shinto often use this to break down our personal, polluted barriers between ourselves and Great Nature. We do so much to taint our bodies, hearts and minds, we can use such a wake-up call. And of course, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the way a renewal can help us heed The Call. So, tonight, with a new moon on the rise, I’ll be in deep meditation, reflection and giving gratitude to the One.

Solstice, Memory, Peers & Beers (Long)

Today is the Summer Solstice. This is also the third anniversary of my mentor’s passing. This is difficult for me, especially right now, because her passing removed a lot of naive ideas I had about my role/duties as a newly ordained priestess. Over the last couple of years, I have fought through many feelings, and in some ways, I became more like her than I thought I would, at least in perspective. She claimed me and two others during that ceremony, taking us as a part of her priestess lineage, much in the way a Sensei passes his teachings to his elder students.

I wondered if she would have felt betrayed by my leaving that first, ordaining organization. I still think she would have understood. Her death meant that I lost the only person I’ve been able to go to for spiritual guidance and support. Not in these last three years have I found anyone whom I could rely on, the way I offered myself to others, and the way she lovingly encouraged me. Now, in 2009, I am a rogue, ordained spiritual woman, with no congregation, no religious affiliation, and no assistance. But there is something good this year, too.

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A Good Song.

“The summer sun, it blows my mind,
Is falling down on all that I’ve ever known.
Time will kiss… the world goodbye.
Falling down on all that I’ve ever known.
Is all that I’ve ever known…

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